War of the Roses
by savage barbie
Summary: The Grand Tradition of the Shinohai Family Christmas and the all of the annual insanity that comes with it. — Tyzula Advent 2016. Dynasty-verse. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: **Some Quick Facts About This Fic:  
Chapters: **4  
 **Ship(s):** Azula x Ty Lee, with MaixOzai, ZukoxKatara, AzulonxIlah and mentioned UrsaxIroh.  
 **Rated:** T for mature humor, sexual themes and moderate language.  
 **Notes:** This is technically a sequel to _Midwinter Madness_ but in the chronology of the Dynasty-verse takes place almost directly after _Off to the Races_. It is a Tyzula Advent entry and each chapter includes six prompts [in chronological order].

* * *

 _WAR OF THE ROSES_

* * *

 _"_ _A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all have to go through it together."  
-Garrison Keillor-_

* * *

Azula arrives at the Versailles of the Rockies with the soundtrack of _The Shining_ playing in her head. Ty Lee hums a Christmas carol while Bunny remains silently plugged in to her iPad.

"This will be so fun," Ty Lee says as she steps out of the car. "I mean, last year it was just me and you and your dad and like pregnant Mai. She's so the worst. I mean, Valerie is cute, but has she like never heard of birth control?"

Azula slams the car door shut. "Has _your_ mom not, Miss Six Siblings and Counting?"

Ty Lee squints, ignoring the insult. "Why did you emphasize 'your'?"

"Because Mai is my mother and don't talk about my mother and…" Azula lowers her voice and, aghast, whispers, "Birth control."

Ty Lee giggles.

Azula glowers.

[X]

Azulon looks at the small families that have branched out from him and Ilah. He does not ever know what to think of them; his feelings about the couples and their children are fleeting and fickle.

His eldest son and his wife are not present; they are in Bandon with Ursa's family. Azulon is displeased and they will suffer for it, but he let them do it. All he has is Zuko, Katara, Kya, Ozai, Mai, Valerie, Azula, Ty Lee, and Bunny. And Ilah, of course.

"Does anyone have news?" asks Azulon, cocking an eyebrow. He knows they will all be too afraid to say a thing. Or perhaps their lives are just more boring than the tabloids imply. "I saw a rumor that Zuko and his cute Eskimo got married."

Azula smirks. Ty Lee squeezes her hand.

"Well—" Katara begins.

"Not the time," Zuko snaps, but she just glares at him.

"Me and Zuko _did_ get married," Katara states, leaning forward. Her cobalt eyes glisten in the light of the roaring fireplace.

Azulon throws his glass into it and the alcohol makes it flare. Everyone screams but Azula, Ozai, Mai and Katara. Bunny wraps herself tightly around Azula, Valerie cries until Mai pushes a pacifier into her mouth, and Kya's huge eyes become even wider.

"When?" growls Azulon as Ilah tries to pat his arm.

"The day after Thanksgiving," says Katara, straightening her posture and meeting the gilded eyes of her husband's grandfather. "We eloped."

Ilah gapes at them; Azulon looks at his second son.

"Why am I having such déjà vu?" His transfers from Zuko to Ozai, which relieves no one. "Nobody in this family has a proper wedding."

Azula raises her hand. "I did."

Azulon's expression softens and she does not hide her smirk of superiority.

"Yes, you had a lovely wedding to a lovely girl who is not an entirely inappropriate romantic choice."

Ty Lee brightly says, "Thank you."

"And," Azulon coldly, bitterly adds, "I'll have you know that none of you seem to know how to have a child within wedlock. It's impressive that none of you have any sense of honor."

Katara is the one to say, "Wasn't your wife pregnant when you married her?"

Azula cannot control her own wife, because Ty Lee bursts into laughter, shaking with the force of her giggles. It is enough to almost inspire choking her own bride to death beneath a Christmas tree.

Ty Lee sneezes and at last stops laughing.

Azulon silently sips his drink.

This will not be a very merry Christmas; a single comment or action can set him off for years.

Grudges are at the core of the Shinohai Family, and, as with all things, they are very good at them.

[X]

"I laughed because he was being mean to me. He was talking about _Bunny_ ," Ty Lee says, trying desperately to make her wife talk to her again. Or not divorce her. Laughing at Katara's sick burn would possibly lead to the end of their two-year marriage.

"Well," says Azula, at last looking at Ty Lee, "it isn't as if he is wrong. Bunny _was_ an accident. An accident I love, but it is not cruelty if it is true. And you were not married to that asshole when you got knocked up."

"I want him to be kind to us. I want to have a happy little family with _just_ you and Bunny and a second baby one day," Ty Lee says, rubbing Azula's shoulder.

Her wife pulls away, especially at the sudden suggestion of another child.

"And people in Hell want ice water," icily replies Azula, standing.

Ty Lee sighs and lets Azula walk away. She needs to calm down.

[X]

Azula walks in on Mai talking to Azulon. She and Ozai have disappointed him, but they seem to be the only ones he is happy with tonight.

"… and I demanded to be called Solstice in eighth grade. No one did, even though I didn't answer to Mai," she says, concluding a story that Azulon clearly _pretended_ to like.

Ozai sees his daughter glaring from the hallway and stands up to calm his little princess down. He takes her aside and they stand in Ilah's sword collection room. They glint tantalizingly on the walls, tempting Azula to simply slaughter everyone in this luxurious cabin.

"Ty Lee is stupid, and she is hot. He'll forgive her for the laughter if she makes some ditzy apology," says Ozai. "Katara and Zuko, on the other hand, are condemned. It's _good_ , little princess. Our team is winning, whether or not Ty Lee acts like a dumb Playboy bunny. My father loves dumb Playboy bunnies."

"Ick," comments Azula. "He seems interested in your wife too."

"Who isn't?" Ozai replies. "She is an ice princess and has his sense of humor. He wants to melt her as much as I did."

"Please tell me 'melt' is not a disgusting euphemism."

"I'm not sure if it is or not," Ozai says earnestly.

"It bothers me that three generations of men in my family want to sleep with Mai. _Mai_."

"And two thirds of them have."

"Again, ick."

"I would feign righteous indignation, but I think it's good for our team that he likes her. We want him to lean towards the red roses."

"The what?"

"The War of the Roses. It's a conflict within a historical royal family."

"Oh." Azula thinks Ozai has made that comparison in the past. "We might as well be one of those, except more Asian than English."

"Now," he says, giving his daughter a reassuring look that reminds her of the safety she felt as a child, "convince Ty Lee to make us look good even further, and perhaps the Red Roses can survive this Christmas."

Azula crosses her arms. She wants to be defiant, but instead sighs and caves in.

"I will talk to her," she says, slipping out of the sword room and trekking up the stairs.

[X]

Azulon sits across from Azula.

She backed out of talking to Ty Lee and decided to test the waters. Azula cannot construct the perfect comments until she knows her grandfather's current state of mind.

"The right woman comes into your life like a natural disaster," says Azulon and everyone nods whether they understand or agree or not. "They destroy everything you have but are very beautiful."

"Please tell me she has not destroyed all I have. She is not very smart, and probably did not even understand Katara's comment," Azula says, sipping Huckleberry coffee across from her grandfather. The woodstove crackles near them, warming the cold air between them.

"You're still in the will," he admits.

"That's not all I meant. I don't want you to be disappointed in me."

"You're still in the will," Azulon repeats.

Azula just smiles and nods. That appears to be the wisest response.

"Thank you," says Azula, batting her eyelashes.

"However," he says like an emperor as he finishes his coffee. "I'm making more decisions after the holidays, as I always do. If your wife insults me and the honor of our family again, we might have a problem."

"She won't," Azula vehemently insists, leaning forward. "I have total control over her."

Azulon faintly smirks at her. "That's my girl."

[X]

In the guest wing, Ty Lee is sulking and watching a cheesy Hallmark Christmas movie with Bunny when Azula walks in. She grins brightly at her wife, but Azula knows she is angry too. Ty Lee simply is too frightened to show that she is unhappy with anyone, especially Azula.

"Do you want to go look at the Christmas lights? They are truly beautiful this year," states Azula, her words an offer but her tone an imposition.

"Yes," Ty Lee says, standing up. She pats Bunny on the head and murmurs at her to be good before sliding on a coat and shoes. She situates on her head her pink knit hat with the cat ears on it, and steps out of the door with her wife.

They stand back and look up at the luminescent manor.

Ty Lee forgets any tension. She always has been distracted by shiny things; Azula knows how to manipulate that.

"They are _gorgeous_ ," Ty Lee brightly says, looking up at the gigantic house. The lights glistening above the snow certainly are pretty. "And you're gorgeous and everything is gorgeous!"

Azula kisses her and softly orders, "Stop saying that word."

"Well, they're really pretty and you're really pretty," Ty Lee says, and Azula prepares to construct the apology Ozai suggested before Ty Lee presses her lips against Azula's. That makes it difficult to talk… or to want to talk.

Azula slides her hand up Ty Lee's back to her neck, and holds her close. They no longer feel the bitter cold of the Montana winter. The heat between them rivals the woodstove inside.

They are bound in blissful solitude for at least a few minutes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

* * *

After Azula and Ty Lee return to reality and leave the lights behind them, "I've never had Tang," says Mai, sipping the orange elixir.

She stands in the kitchen with Azula, Ty Lee, Zuko and Ilah. They all came to make Christmas cupcakes but only Ty Lee is putting any effort into the baking. It is the dead of the night and no one has any interest in recipe books.

"Do you like it?" asks Ilah, ceasing to aid her granddaughter's wife. She turns and leans against the counter to talk to the gathered young adults.

"I do," Mai says with a shrug. She softly smiles after a second sip.

Zuko sees the curve of her lips and his expression sours.

"So, only Tang can melt the ice princess," says Zuko, glaring. "We should market it that way."

"Do any of you want to go riding with me?" asks Ilah, desperate to change the subject before Zuko and Mai fight.

"Can you do that in the snow?" asks Ty Lee, tilting her head to the side. She sneezes suddenly from the flour.

"Yes. Mai?" Ilah offers.

"I don't like riding horses," says the newly named ice princess. "I got a pony when I was a kid, but I only rode it once."

"Why?" inquires Azula. She does not remember that.

"I liked the pony, but I didn't like the part where it moved. My parents only gave it to me as an apology, anyway," Mai flatly explains with a cavalier shrug.

"For what?" Ilah inquires, cocking an eyebrow.

Mai sighs, shakes her head and answers, "They forgot me at the airport. They forgot me a lot, which was absurd because I was their only child for fourteen years and Ty Lee and Zuko never were forgotten anywhere once."

Zuko fiercely corrects, "I was forgotten at the airport when I was seventeen."

Azula scoffs and says, "You weren't _forgotten_. Mother told me you were coming and I just didn't tell father. It didn't seem very important, and you were at home when we arrived, _so_ you are just being a drama queen."

Ty Lee giggles, and sneezes again.

"That counts as father forgetting me," growls Zuko.

"Oh, shut up. If you are angry, blame mother. She should have told someone other than me that you were coming. She should have _known_ that I find nothing more beautiful than the idea of you lost and probably scared as you sob hysterically about how much your daddy hates you," Azula says, smirking. "It is like heroin. That is how good it feels to think about that scenario."

Zuko punches the wall.

Thankfully, this time he does not leave a dent.

[X]

That night, "Why is it so cold?" Bunny asks, crawling into bed with her mothers and wedging herself between them. Her knee collides with Ty Lee's back, making her yelp. Azula softly snickers; Ty Lee had that coming. "It's cold."

Azula sighs and says to her wife, "Ty Lee, go find out why it's so cold."

Ty Lee buries her face in her pillow in a futile attempt to pretend to be asleep. Azula refuses to fall for it.

"We are both comfortable, I know, but it is inexplicably cold and you have jeopardized my inheritance, so, honestly, it falls on you to figure out the problem."

Ty Lee slowly begins to stand up, but when her skin touches the frigid air, she slides back into the blankets.

"Does it really matter _why_ it's cold? It's just super cold," Ty Lee softly says, tugging the blankets up higher over her body. "Let's stay comfy and figure it out tomorrow."

"I can live with that," groggily replies Azula.

They both fall asleep in a guest house with a broken furnace.

[X]

In the freezing morning, Azula sits at the breakfast table with her daughter and her horrible sister-in-law. God, she is a _sister-in-law_. Azula knew she and Zuko would never break up, and she also knows that she is entirely responsible for their wedding, but that does not make her happy about it. Nothing could possibly make a lifetime stuck with Katara be a good thing.

Azula is wrapped in her parka, scarf, gloves and hat. Bunny is bundled up as well. Katara sits casually in her pajamas without so much as a robe.

"How can you be comfortable in this weather? The furnace is broken in the _mountains_ in _winter_ ," Azula snarls at Katara.

Katara shrugs. "I'm from Alaska. Anyway, you can have the fire soon; your grandmother wants us to play games and sit by the woodstove."

Bunny looks aghast. "I don't _wanna_ play board games; I _wanna_ play _Grand Theft Auto_!" she exclaims as she glares at her mother.

Azula's eyes harden. "Then poker. We will play poker," she coldly suggests, her eyes as frigid as the room she sits in.

Bunny wails, "That's not better!"

Azula rubs her temples. "I will buy you a car if you come downstairs and play poker."

At first, Bunny is thrilled, but then she realizes, "I can't drive; I'm eight!"

"I will buy you two cars if you come downstairs and play poker. And I will let you watch _Homicide for the Holidays_ with us," Azula says. Bunny contemplates the deal for a few moments before nodding. "You will act like a sweet and adorable and polite child, or you will receive no reward."

Bunny grins. "I'm always sweet and adorable and polite! Especially when there's presents!"

"Oh, the innocence of children," remarks Katara under her breath. She finishes slicing her orange with a grimace.

Bunny does not understand the comment.

Azula ignores it.

[X]

During the debacle called poker with an obscenely competitive family, Azula slinks outside with her gorgeous sentimental lighter in hand and a pack of excuses-to-leave-the-room. She stands in the ice and hopes to not light the fur of her winter gear on fire as she sets a cigarette ablaze.

Ty Lee follows her, garbed in a blindingly pink parka. "Seriously?"

"You shouldn't leave the room. Grandfather is mad at you," Azula says, glaring again.

Ty Lee sighs; she is getting tired of Azula's anger at her. She feels _terribly_ that she laughed at Katara's comment, but she cannot take it back.

"I said I was going to share a cigarette with you." Ty Lee pouts.

Azula cocks an eyebrow. "You look annoyed."

"I seriously disapprove of all of your addictions," says Ty Lee, crossing her arms.

"Yes, but I am in charge of the relationship and you have to tolerate all I do and obey everything I say," Azula casually replies with a shrug. Ty Lee scowls. "Oh, what? You agreed to marry me and you knew the ground rules of our relationship."

Ty Lee huffily sighs. "It's because I love you, Azula. It's because I love you that I'm going to be really nice to your grandfather and maybe be kinda sexy to make up for it, and it's because I love you that I really want another baby, and it's because I love you that I want you to quit smoking."

Azula rolls her eyes. "Well, it is because I love you that I pretend to listen to your demands." She rests her left hand on Ty Lee's shoulder. "And it is because I love Bunny that I refuse to have a second child. I see what that does. My father and uncle, me and my brother…"

Ty Lee gently shakes her head, but she does not voice her thousand protests. The truth is, if they are good parents, they will not have to worry about that, but she knows Azula needs time.

"I'll wait for you. I'll wait forever if I have to, because I love you." Ty Lee kisses Azula, but it is broken up by her sneezing again.

Azula coughs.

Ty Lee accidentally inhales smoke.

It is not a very romantic moment anymore.

[X]

By the fire still, Mai says, "I'll be the judge. I don't do push-ups."

She sits and watches Azula and Zuko glare at each other before dropping to the floor. Ty Lee follows with a huge smile.

The rest of the family looks on with various incredulous expressions. Mai suppresses a laugh as she says, "Alright, start."

Azulon could not be more confused by the display. It is probably better than a fistfight, he must say. Although, he always likes it when his family breaks into acts of violence over the inheritance or his favor or any of their other absurd issues.

Azula and Zuko shoot each other fierce expressions as they do perfect push-ups. Ty Lee keeps smiling as she easily does the same.

Zuko falls first. Azula stumbles and rolls onto her back. Ty Lee jumps up.

"I won!" she chirps.

Azula sighs. Ty Lee does have impressive upper body strength.

[X]

The fire continues to warm the small room as the family sits trapped inside.

Bunny plays with Kya as Ty Lee looks on. It would be so cute if they had another little kid to play with Bunny. It would be _adorable_.

Mai feeds Valerie a few crumbs of sugar cookies. Ilah grabs her hand to stop her.

"She's already so chunky," Ilah breathlessly says. "She really shouldn't be eating cookies."

Mai cocks an eyebrow and whispers, "She's a baby."

"A _chunky_ baby," Ilah corrects.

Mai does not care enough to argue.

[X]

Azula sits on the piano bench and, at the request of Azulon, performs for him. She always has had to do this since she was a child, and she is used to it by now.

She is halfway through her signature Christmas song at the moment with, " _Nails, spears shall pierce him through_ —"

"What?" interrupts Bunny. " _What_? Why are there nails and spears in a Christmas song!"

Azula sighs and crashes her fingers down on the piano keys. The sound is unpleasant and makes everyone in the room cringe.

"Because Jesus died that way," Azula exasperatedly explains.

Bunny's jaw drops. Azula closes her eyes and tries to avoid murdering everyone here.

"That's horrible!" Bunny exclaims, her eyes rotund as full moons. "He's a _baby_!"

Mai mutters to Ozai, "A _chunky_ baby," and he hits her knee.

"He does not _stay_ a baby," Azula says, now truly considering whipping out one of her grandmother's swords and going _Kill Bill_ on everyone in attendance. At least she would get the inheritance before Azulon could write her out of the will for having such a heathen child.

"Really?" Bunny cocks her head to the side like a confused puppy.

"Really." Azula sighs.

She glances at Azulon, her eyes pleading, _'Are we okay?'_ and the subtle shake of his head answering her question.

[X]

"Someone needs to get the parts so I can fix the furnace," says Azulon. "There is a very well-stocked hardware store in West."

"I volunteer," announces Azula, boldly standing.

She _must_ regain her high status in Azulon's eyes.

" _Azula_ ," Ty Lee says, seizing her wife by the wrist. "What if you die? You could die! The snow is so deep and it's so cold and…!"

All Azula does is kiss Ty Lee on the lips.

She softly says, "Goodbye. If I die, I want you to know that I am so angry at you and Bunny that the sweet release of death by hypothermia or car crash would be the greatest Christmas gift in the history of time."

Ty Lee bites back tears as Azula grabs her purse and leaves.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

* * *

"Why was the fitbit on a horse?" Ty Lee softly asks.

She still sits in the living room by the woodstove. Azula is braving the elements in one of her grandfather's several trucks while the family barely conceals their dysfunctions beneath the light of the Christmas tree and the shadows of the fireplace.

Ilah replies, "I wasn't going to _lose_ the competition, now was I?"

Ty Lee hopes Azula will get back soon, even if she is so angry.

"Did you win?" asks Ty Lee, attempting a smile.

"Of course. I always win," states Ilah, and Ty Lee sees Azula in her for the first time. "Now, do you keep yourself in shape? Since you do so very little for the world, do you at least take care of yourself or are you as much of a failure as my husband believes?"

Azula walks in and Zuko gives a sarcastic, _Yaaay_ , that his daughter imitates in earnest.

"I succeeded at my mission, father," coldly says Azula with a signature smirk.

With her eyes wide, Ty Lee tries to telepathically communicate to her wife, _"Rescue me, please!"_

Azula understands, because, she says, "I will be kidnapping Ty Lee. She should help me repair the furnace."

No one protests.

[X]

An hour later, Bunny, Azula and Ty Lee emerge victorious from their furnace repair mission. The rest of the family is in the midst of a surprisingly calm poker game. Perhaps the ice around them managed to quell the fire that fuels the Shinohais.

Azulon stands and hands Bunny three hundred dollar bills. "Here, Mistsuko," he says. "As I promised this good little grandchild."

Azula waits for Bunny to victoriously count her reward and extends a hand.

"I expect two of those."

Bunny's eyebrows shoot up, bewildered, "What?"

"Well, I gave you the job and I deserve a cut," states Azula. "That is business, my love."

Zuko scoffs and remarks, "You sound like a pimp in a Lifetime movie."

"You sound like a crippling failure who doesn't know how to get rich on his own." Azula does not rescind the gesture and Bunny begrudgingly hands over the cash.

Ilah stands, turning to Katara, Azula and Ty Lee. She then glances at the others in the room and scowls. She gazes at her granddaughters, all three useless for various reasons.

"Now that the home is warming up, you two can help me make coffee and dinner," says the feminist who fought in a hundred rallies in the decades of revolution. "Hurry up."

Ty Lee swiftly scampers after her. Azula approves of the eagerness to please, and pursues her wife with Katara beside her. The two girls turn and Azula looks up at the most _idiotic_ decoration in the history of purely family events.

And, Azula says, as Katara's eyes follow hers, "I would sooner burn this house to the ground, taking the mistletoe with it, than kiss you."

"The feeling is mutual." Katara smiles and faintly laughs.

Azula turns and enters the kitchen. She sits on her phone, doing valuable work for the family business, while Ty Lee does all of the work, Ilah observes her like a slave, and Katara attempts to clean out the pantry.

"This soup is from 1967," Katara incredulously exclaims, holding up the likely radioactive can.

"Then do your job and throw it out," prettily orders Ilah, and Katara sighs.

She does not know why she obeys. "Azula could help. Grab my phone for me?"

Azula looks over her shoulder and reaches towards it. Her fingertips graze it but she cannot reach. "It is too far away. You are on your own."

Ty Lee grins at Katara, trying to remain warm, and says, "No rest for the wicked."

Katara glares at Azula and mumbles, "Around here the wicked are always rested."

Azula's lip twists into a snarl. "I will go babysit Bunny, Valerie and Kya."

Everyone knows that means she will be flattering her grandfather under the pretense of being a caring parent, but they let her leave anyway.

As Azula walks in, she sees Bunny with a gift on an ancient scale.

"No peeking!" she orders in her scariest tone.

"I'm not _peeking_. I'm just weighing the package and then looking up the weight of the Xbox on Amazon. That's not peeking."

Azula smirks at an adopted child who might as well be her progeny.

[X]

Zuko sits, sickened by Azula's sweet words that grandfather laps up.

"Next year she does transfer to Catholic school. I wanted to keep her in place until fifth grade so that she could blossom socially. As we all know, that is very important," Azula purrs, her eyes wide and glittering. Zuko rolls her eyes; it is how she looks when she talks to Ozai. "Mistuko is much brighter than Ty Lee, who, truly, is cleaning your house and cooking for you. She's very dedicated to the wellness of the Shinohai Family."

Zuko at last cannot take it and scoffs. "Oh, will _you shut up_? Katara is the one who made that snide remark. Everyone knows Ty Lee is stupid and that's why people all love her. Grandfather isn't even actually religious, and you don't have any need to sweet talk him."

Azula glowers and Ozai looks up from Valerie.

A sister asks a brother, "Do you ever get invited anywhere on purpose?"

"Yes," growls Zuko.

[X]

"I only have four-hundred followers," cries Bunny to Katara. She sits in the kitchen after being banished by Ozai. She tried to put bells on Valerie's neck and he scared her to death and threatened to burn her face in the woodstove if she almost strangled his daughter again. Now Ilah, Ty Lee and Katara must listen to the ravings of a famous eight-year-old. "My mother has like a million. I'm really pretty and should have more like Kylie Jenner! I'm way cooler and prettier than Kylie Jenner but I don't have a make-up line!"

"Bunny," says her Aunt Katara, setting down the tenth garbage bag of expired food and striding to the girl sitting at the marble island, "Hitler had three million followers; Jesus had twelve."

"I hate you!" Bunny shrieks.

Katara does not know why she expected a different answer.

[X]

Azula joins the girls in the kitchen after Azulon enters a deep conversation with Mai. Azula hopes her father is right about using Mai to the advantage of their roses.

"Bunny, the Monster is very far away. Fetch me some, oh, and three cyclobenazpine and five benadryl while you're at it," Azula orders, and her unruly daughter surprisingly obeys. "I have this horrible aching in my back and side. What organ is here?" asks Azula, gesturing at her side and abdomen. She sets down her phone at last.

"Your kidney," immediately explains Katara. "You probably have kidney failure from your substance abuse issues."

"Oh, shut up," snaps Azula. Pause. Bunny spills a bottle of prescription pain medication all over the old wooden floor. "So, how much do I have to pay you to steal one of Zuko's and give it to me?"

"That's not…" murmurs Katara, somehow still stunned by Azula after all of this time.

Azula rolls her eyes. "Oh, please, no one would become a doctor for reasons other than getting rich. You must have as much lust for money as everyone else in this house. Valerie already prefers playing with coins over her toys."

"I actually really enjoy helping people," honestly states Zuko's wife. "What I was trying to say had nothing to do with money, but with the fact that I'm not a nephrologist."

"Oh, shut up." Azula means it this time.

She does gently touch the sector of her body that aches and hopes she does not need a new kidney.

[X]

 _Ring. Ring. Ring. Ting. Ting. Ting, ting, ting. Ring._

Azula smashes her fingertip down on the remote and turns to face her child. "Be quiet; I'm watching _Lie to Me_ and trying to forget how much I hate all of you."

"But I'm putting bells on Kya," says Bunny, flashing a grin.

Azula snickers at the jingling collar meant for dogs and reindeer.

Maybe her little girl is not as awful as she sometimes thinks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

* * *

Azula sits with Ty Lee on the floor of their room in the guest house. The wind blows fiercely against the wooden walls of the Versailles of the Rockies. They set up the stockings of their little girl and do their last minute wrapping.

They have not removed the hidden Xbox One, but Azula carelessly chews the gumballs from their box. Bunny will not miss them.

Ty Lee looks up from the final gift she tapes up.

Azula remarks, "I just chewed so much Dubble Bubble that I feel like I made out with a xenomorph."

From behind them, Bunny inquires, "What's a xenomorph?"

Azula casually explains, "It is an animal that comes from an egg the queen lays, and it latches onto the face of the host in its first life stage, then lays another egg… I think, and then in the next stage of its metamorphosis, it bursts out of your chest as you scream, then goes through _another_ metamorphosis to become a large monster with fangs on its tongue and acid for blood."

Bunny blanches. Her elbows dig into her body as she feels a rush of fear. Ty Lee sighs and shakes her head.

"Where does it live?" Bunny whispers, brown eyes wide.

"In your closet. Now go back to bed or Santa won't come," says Azula. Ty Lee laughs.

Bunny scowls. "Santa isn't real."

"Who told you that?" demands Ty Lee, angrily standing up.

"Grandma Ilah," replies her daughter.

"When?" Ty Lee demands.

"Today."

"Well," huffily says Azula, "Grandma Ilah is a liar. She is far more artificial than Santa."

"Grandma Mai says that _you're_ a liar and so _you're_ the more artificial person," snaps Bunny, struggling with the larger words despite her age. Ty Lee laughs again.

"She has a point," says Ty Lee, her lips twitching with a smile.

Bunny explains further, "Grandma Ilah told me that it was my turn to be Santa Clause."

Ty Lee cocks an eyebrow. "What?"

"Ugh," says Azula. "It is this story about two parents struggling to tell their child Santa isn't real and they tell the child that he's old enough to become a Santa Clause and asks him to get a gift for some mean neighbor bitch and he does and maybe it would warm my heart if I had one."

Bunny softly insists, "You have a heart."

Azula rolls her eyes. "If I had a heart, I would not be eating all of the gumballs from my child's Christmas stocking."

Bunny glowers. "I don't even like bubblegum. Can you just put money in there?"

"Go the fuck to sleep, Bunny," orders Ty Lee.

Her little girl obeys.

[X]

Ty Lee shivers as they walk into the guest house living room. Katara has opened a window and the windchill has rendered the room freezing. Azula wraps an arm around Ty Lee to keep her warm. Zuko tries to hide his shivering on the sofa.

Azula walks forward and slams the window shut.

"Katara, you need to understand that you are on the bottom of the pecking order and cannot open or close any windows or doors," purrs Azula, guiding her wife to an armchair. Ty Lee sits on her lap.

Katara coldly says, "Every holiday that passes with me drowning you in a bathtub is a miracle."

Azula just smirks.

Mai enters the room just as Azula and Ty Lee get settled. She crosses her arms and sits down.

"Are you impatient for morning?" Azula inquires, studying her stepmother.

"I'm just so bored. It isn't like Valerie will even remember this holiday," says Mai, sighing. "I don't really care about Christmas morning anymore. I'm old. It's sad."

A surprising voice speaks up. Ilah.

"Well, perhaps you're mature like your much older husband claims you are," Ilah mocks, leaning against the once-open window. "His fiftieth birthday is coming up, and you are not yet thirty."

"How is he almost fifty?" Ty Lee asks, her eyes bulging. She _is_ old.

Ilah laughs. "I can tell you exactly how it happened fifty years ago in great detail."

Azula gags. Ty Lee hits her knee. Everyone attempts to laugh.

"Katara," says Ilah, "you seem to know all about it, don't you?"

"I apologize for that comment. I was agitated from a long car ride with Kya and I've already received a lot of criticism for being an unwed mother with Zuko," states Katara. Her words are rehearsed, but she knows she must say them.

Ilah waves a hand. "You all are far too nervous about my husband's opinion. I assure you that he doesn't care, and he just likes to watch you all frantically try to get on his good side."

Ty Lee kisses Azula's cheek and whispers in her ear, " _See_. Do you still hate me?"

Azula whispers back, "Yes," but her blush betrays her lie.

[X]

Bunny jumps on Azula and Ty Lee's bed at four AM.

"It's Christmas! It's Christmas! It's Christmas!"

Azula groans into her pillow. "Five more minutes."

"I want my Xbox!" Bunny eagerly shrieks, lying down between her mothers. "Let's go! Kya is up! We both woke up!"

The girls _did_ share a room. Azula sits up and Ty Lee follows suit.

[X]

Bunny cradles her Xbox in her arms like a newborn baby. Azula is pleased with the gift she gave. Kya opens her presents. Katara steals Valerie—earning a fierce glare from her father-in-law—and helps her play with her gift as she kneels on the floor.

Everyone else keeps drinking cowboy coffee and sitting on the expensive furniture.

Ty Lee opens gorgeous jewelry and kisses Azula. "You're the One, aren't you?"

"Of course I am. We decided that last Christmas when you proposed to me," says Azula, the fond memory warming her skin. She tries to hide it, but Ty Lee feels the rush.

"That was pleasant," says Azulon. He glances up at Ty Lee. "I have a gift for you as well. I'm not writing you out of the will, because you're very good for my favorite grandchild."

Zuko clenches his jaw, but ignores the comment.

"The best Christmas gift," Azula says. "Thank you."

Ty Lee squints. "Better than our engagement rings."

Azula pats Ty Lee's hand. "Yes. Much better than our engagement rings."

Well, Ty Lee is lucky to have found the One, even if she is owned by her grandfather.

Across the room, Ilah opens a present from Zuko's new wife.

"It's horse oil. I got it from Korea," Katara says, smiling. It is an awkward gift from a vegetarian to a horse lover.

"Horse oil?" asks Ilah, cocking an eyebrow.

Ty Lee, aghast, asks Azula, "It comes from their fur, right?"

Azula laughs and smirks. "Of course it does, my love. It comes from their fur."

"Good."

Ty Lee grins, the presents continue being opened, the holiday is not half-bad.

 **THE END**


End file.
